Douglas Alexander and Hugh Henry (Shuggie and Duggie)

Following the fall from grace of Wendy (second trumpet in the Alexanders' rag time band) Alexander (for it is she), it seems as if Hugh (the hammer) Henry and Douglas (the golden one and future anointed) Alexander are getting some training in for new careers, presumably in anticipation of the result of the next Westminster elections. Shuggie and Duggie have little to commend them to the voters next time round. Shuggie has been virtually invisible, no doubt not wishing to associate himself with the rest of the duds in his party. Duggie, on the other hand seems to have his own personal photographer who follows him around while he is grinning and gripping the hand of anyone who still feels that they want to be seen with the man who reduced our electoral system to Zimbabwean levels. One sycophantic Labour placeman described duggie to me as 'one in a million' and my immediate thought was 'Christ, how unlucky can you get?' Still, at least he and his cronies are on the way out.

I think the bin bag might be filled with pictures of Big Gordy, the big clunking fist.

Douglas Alexander and the Local Press

Duggie, the golden one and future anointed (I wish he'd resign so I can stop having to type this out all the time) published his regular column in the Paisley Daily Express today, and most congratulatory to the Labour party it was. He didn't, however, mention his part in the elections, only congratulating Wendy (for it is she) Alexander (second trumpet in the Alexanders' rag time band) and Hugh (Shuggie the hammer) Henry among others, on their success.

Perhaps next time he will be able to tell us how he cocked it all up, if he's still there, which he shouldn't be.

Terry Kelly and Hugh Henry Campaign against themselves ?

Terry (TKMax) Kelly and Hugh (Shuggie the Hammer) Henry are on the front page of the Paisley Daily Express today campaigning against the building of a new prison in Paisley.

This is a bit surprising since

1. Labour are in power at every level in this country so it is their proposal
2. Hugh (Shuggie etc) Henry is the justice minister and in charge of policing
3. Renfrewshire Labour councillors sit on the Strathclyde police board so they are responsible for the proposal
4. The Labour majority council can deny the planning application if they wish, so clearly they don't
5. It is Labour policy on crime that has filled the jails with usually the wrong people
6. They don't say where the jail should be built if it is needed
7. If they had been tough on the causes of crime as they promised at election after election then the jail wouldn't be needed

The result of this policy failure is Labour out sucking up to voters by pretending that they are not responsible for their own decisions and policies.

In terms of sheer two faced hypocrisy and opportunism this one has got to take the biscuit.

I have to ask the question (again). How stupid do these numpties think the voters are. Labour should stop acting like low life con men and accept responsibility for their cock-ups.

Wendy (for it is she) the second trumpet in the Alexanders' rag time band is very quick to get her face in the papers when they think (not very often) that they have done something right, even if it is years too late. Still, it brightens up the paper when you see someone smiling but you just know that the smile is so insincere that they will never have laughter lines. That's why Wendy (for it is she) looks so young.

Johnstone Town Centre and the Labour Party

I want to send my sympathy to the people of Johnstone. Labour have decided to re-develope your town centre, according to a piece of election propoganda dropped through my door today. Seeing what they have done to Paisley there must be a dread running through all of Johnstone.

Hugh 'Shuggie the hammer' Henry, the man who single handedly solved Ferguslie's drug problem? has fixed it for you to have all of the skill and expertise which ran Paisley into the ground, and forced it to go back about 10 years and start again with its town centre.

I've had a brilliant idea about how Hugh could solve the drug problem in Johnstone as well. If we let him and the other trumpets in the Alexanders' rag time band run the illegal drug industry then it will be ruined and in crisis in about a fortnight.

Election Update : Bliar Visits Paisley

My apologies but shift working has meant I've been neglecting the blog.
While I've been away Paisley has had a visit from Bliar and his entourage. You would imagine that, with an election in the offing, he would be keeping a low profile. He is not the asset he once was especially in Scotland. I don't remember seeing his smiling face on any of the candidates' election leaflets, but if I'm wrong no doubt someone will correct me.

Hugh 'Shuggie the Hammer' Henry has apparently decided that, after years of opposing Catholic schools, he is now their champion. My own view will remain my own, but there is a distinct smell of hypocrisy about everything Shuggie does these days.

More shady dealing over Labour election broadcasts with party hacks being drafted in to pose as real people. As if no-one would know that a Scottish Bliar supporter had to be a plant (or some other kind of vegetable).

The smirking fish has been quiet, presumably letting Labour self-destruct.

What else is new, well, the Greens are being green, the Lib/ Dems are being all things to all men, and the Scottish Senior Citizens Unity Party are deciding where to exercise grey power. The Scottish Christian Party are hoping for a miracle, Solidarity are furiously promoting the cult of multiple personality and the SSP are fighting to hold the line after a bad year.